Friday, April 30, 2010

I'll be there

Okay.  I'm home and kind of crowny.  Here's the Four Topss and some covers of I'll be there.  First the 4 Tops here and now Michael Bolton ( a great cover) here and Toto before they were way good singing in some join n Toronto. Dude is smoking and drinking a beer it's here.  Good times!
 .

Here's an example "The Toad"

Here's the deal.  This is the kind of story I'm talking about. One of the greatest of all time.  Tell me what you think. Click here

Changing the face, maybe.

So I want to put a question out there for the people who read this.  When I started this crappy blog it was going to be about politics and Bobcat football  and maybe some other things.  Yet when I write about my life and stories I get the biggest response.  I have a thousand (well maybe not that many) but a lot of stories about growing up in Malta.  Whenever I write those I get many comments about them. The problem is that most of my stories have more than a fair share of alcohol involved.  Its how we grew up. 

Here's an example.  Back in the day when The Prodigy used to work with me, we'd be out having a beer and I'd tell a story.  Finally TP looks at me and says "Do all your stories start out with 'this one time Ralph and Danny and I grabbed a 12 pack?'"  I said most of them did because that's what we did.  Then my high school buddy Lips came to Bozeman. TP, Will, Lips and I went out for some beers.  Lips was on a run and would say, "You remember that time you, me and Jim grabbed a 12 pack and went.......?"  TP looks at me and says "His stories start just like yours."

Life was different back then. In small town Montana we drank and drove.  Things didn't get out of hand but that was the life we led.  Most times someone was always in control and could run the wheel but not always.  My question is this for my non-Montana readers, do you want to hear about these stories?  No one was hurt. Yes at times we were not very responsible but we have become that way but these stories are good.  It's what I want to write about. My life.  My great friends who I grew up with and still to this day hang with. They are the best friends any man  could ever hope to have and I'm lucky enough to have them.

My problem is that I have some great readers from all over the country who I don't know from Adam.  My blog is the worst of the bunch from the people I follow yet they read me.

My stories will be long but after a couple you will know all the players. Ralph, Delmer, Jimmy, Dan, Adrian and many others.. The entire lot. God but I have great friends.

We've known each other since we were 4 or 5.  We graduate from Malta together.  We've been in each other's weddings and helped each other bury a parent. I want to blog about the times we've had.  Do you want to read about it is the question.

I don't want anyone to quit because it's boring.  I'll keep doing what else I do but want to share this life with you all.  I can't imagine even being here without them.

I'll even re-post some stories some of you have never read which are pretty good.

Your thoughts.

What a Friday

I'll be honest.  Its tough to upset me on a Friday.  I will intentionally avoid any kind of situation that might ruin Friday.  If a customer is having a problem that can wait til Monday, then he's going to wait.  Today looked like it could be screwed from the beginning.  I walked out to start my truck and there was a couple inches of snow on the ground.  Its chilly out obviously.  I've put my broom back in the garage which is stupid.  I've lived in Montana my entire life and seen snow every month including July and August.

 Anyway, I climbed into my truck and started it.  This is where I almost gagged.  "Mr. Roboto" was playing on the radio.  This is the song that ruined Styx and is why Dennis DeYoung needs an ass kicking.  It still kind of pisses me off.  So after I brushed the snow off my windshield, I decided to head to work.  "Mr. Roboto" was ending and then the day turn completely around.  That's right sportsfans.  Styx was followed by Rick James and "Superfreak".  Two great lyrics by Rick James "She says I'm her all time favorite" and "Temptations sing"  Powerful stuff. This was followed by Talking Heads "And she was".  Its a great song.  Great beat.  Stupid Talking Heads lyrics.  The whole nine yards. 

XM Radio is effing awesome.

So here's a couple of videos for ya.  Happy Friday MoFo's.  Closing the biggest sale of my career today and then I'm going to be drinking some Crown Royal!  Yahoo!!!!!!!!!!!  Also, click here for a short Styx playlist.  Goddam commies at playlist didn't have much to choose from.    The ground is white, I can't see the Bridgers and its still awesome.



Here's some Rick James.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

TP and Netters

Just got off the phone with The Prodigy.  The MoFo is in Arizona with his lovely wife.  They are celebrating their 10th anniversary. It's hard to believe that it's been 10 years.  They had their ceremony in Hawaii on the beach. Then in July (or was it June) they said their vows in a church to the delight of their parents and grandparents. That's where this story takes place.

Its not the drunkest I've ever been.  It's the drunkest I've ever been ushering at a wedding in a tuxedo though.  You see, as they were already married, we decided to play golf on the wedding day.  We went to Buffalo to play 18.  My brother-in-law drove out from New York and was our DD.  We were on about the 12th hole when we ran into TP's physical therapist.  He's a guy about TP's age and was golfing with his best friend Skinny.  Things were a little backed up so Skinny and the p.t. went back to the clubhouse to get more beer as we could tell that there wasn't going to be near enough.  We were right.  We stopped at the therapists house on the way back as his liquor cabinet was full and, well, we had a couple more.

We finally get back to TP's house and we are more than half in the bag.  "Holy shit, there's champagne in your living room."  "Open up a bottle".  So we did.  By this time there are about 8 people at the house.  We run through the shower and get our monkey suits on.  Wedding's at 7, we've been drinking since noon, but like I said, they were already married.  Well it's after six and we are cleaned and ready.  There is only one problem.  There's no bride.  No Netters.  She is a major player in the ceremony so she really needs to show up.  She's not at the church because her dress is hanging in the bedroom.  The good news is that there is still plenty of champagne so we have some more.

Netters makes it.  Jumps in her dress and we head to church.  Johnny Coke and I are ushers and when we get to the church there is this huge line of people waiting to be seated.  JC and I raced them to their seats.  Man we were really getting them in their pews in record time.  Gary, my brother-in-law swears he saw sparks coming of TP's grandmother's shoes when I seated her in the church.

Well, everything went off without a hitch.  I drank water most of the night from there on out as I was having a spot of trouble with the King's English.  We even left some champagne for the reception.  Can't quite remember but I think we drank a 1/2 case on the front steps waiting for Netters.

Anyway it's already been 10 years since we did that.  Wow.  More good times ahead.

Congratulations Tim and Lynette.  Your great friends and make life that much more fun. 

If you like John Denver.......

Then click here.  Made a little playlist for your listening pleasure.  I was actually looking for a different John Denver song to add to my "Sad Songs" playlist but couldn't find it so I just decided to make a list of his songs.  Couldn't get to 14 though.  That kind of bums me out.  Of course on a day like today it's easy to do.  It's snowing out.  I hate spring in Bozeman.  

Here's a guy that's not a John Denver fan.  Its a very poor quality youtube.  I'm not apologizing for it.  I didn't do it.  Just sayin its pretty fuzzy and the audio isn't that good, but they do mention "Mr. Sunshine on my goddam shoulders John Denver!"  "I hate to break this up be we got a 10-92."  I guess that's better than doing a 10-100.  My head is filled with mush.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Movie Clip Wednesday 4/28/10 "Animals"


This week our glorious host has chose the theme of animals.  I'll give it to  Boxer, she really makes you think. I chose the scene entitled "The Descent" from The Man from Snowy River.  Top five all time movies for me.  I've spent more than a day or two horseback in my life so when I watch this I'm in total awe.  Tom Burlinson, who played Jim Craig in the movie, was the actual rider.  Dude can flat out ride a horse and pop a whip. Denny is the name of the horse for those of you keeping score at home.

"You can bid the mob good day"  Not if you're Jim Craig!

(I think I still have a crush on Sigrid Thornton)


Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Poems: They do not know.

THEY DO NOT KNOW

Strings of pearls, about her neck
and her hair falls gently down.
Diamonds in soft, sweet lobes
Setting off her gown.

She makes her way across the floor
Her locks softly flowing.
All eyes agaze at her beauty
Her midnight blue dress flowing.

The dark soft hair it hangs,
so softly on her shoulders.
No on notices what she wears
But so subtly it smoulders.

All dressed up, she slowly waits
And receives more than a glance.
Many suitors search for courage
And hoping for a chance.

Her smile lights up the room
And yet they all ponder.
"What's a girl have to do?
To get a dance?" She wonders.

They do not know, the power
They have upon us men.
Sometimes we are so frightened
So they go home alone, again.

CG 2/21/06

Streets where I have lived.

The Hotfessional has a list of streets where she has lived so far in her life.  As I am void of any original thought, I thought I'd post a list as well.   Got nothin else to do.

THE MALTA LIST
5th Avenue West - One of Ray Benson's rental houses.  It seemed so much bigger than it is here. I fell off the railing on the porch trying to climb up on the roof when I was five. Greenstick fracture on my right wrist.  I wasn't supposed to be crawling up there. I was with Delmer and we had been told to stay off the roof.  I told Mom that my brother Bill pushed me off the porch so I wouldn't get in trouble.  I came clean when I graduated from college in 1992.  My brother never ratted me out.  I think it was on 5th Avenue West.  The porch is enclosed now.  Delmer tried to keep my from crying by feeding me Spree candies.  It didn't work.


4th Street West - Still my favorite of all time.  This house was huge.  My dad built a bedroom in the basement.  Sister LP had the room first.  Then sister Scooch.  Then, finally me.  I loved that room.  I remember waiting for KMMR to switch from their country format at 10 PM to play one hour of pop music.  Played a lot of dart baseball down there as well.  The basement was huge.  Brother Bill and I had many, many GI Joe adventures there.  The yard was huge and I had to mow it every Saturday for my allowance.  In the summer, Bill and I would sit in the front porch and drink lemonade and read comic books.  Good times.  Almost getting myself misty eyed over here. My dad built the picket fence himself to keep the high school kids from cutting across our lawn at lunch time.  It was built in 1969.  I don't care what you say, that's craftsmanship.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Sometimes you gotta do it.

So in my surfing of the internet and looking at various sites, I come across many things of interest (as we all do) but sometimes you come across things that you just have to post.  This youtube is from the George Lopez show.  Now, George is about as funny as the clap, but this video of William Shatner and Korean singing sensation Lin Yu Chun is pure gold baby!!  To quote the guys at The Warming Glow, who tipped me off to this BTW,  "this is what the internet was made for."  Enjoy



Your Monday Calvin 4/26/10

August 20, 1986

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Random thoughts #18

Things that crossed my mind while wondering how much it would cost to buy a Russian woman.

Somebody buy my house so I can move to Sheridan and schlep drinks for The Prodigy.  TP has a project he is getting underway and I'm ready for a change.  Need to sell my little townhouse before I go.  Somebody reading this wants to move here so cough up the dough and help a brother out.

I have 34 first cousins on my mom's side of the family and 25 on my dad's.  How many people can say they have 59 first cousins. Not counting Mormon's.  My cousin Pat (mom's side) is a grizzly fan.  Other than that he's good shit. He knows every cousin.  Where they are, what they are doing, how many kids they have and most of their names. Hi is the true "keeper of the flame" for our late grandparents.  Its remarkable.

Speaking of my cousins.  Pat's sister Mary is a doll. The youngest of four and the only girl, she is a good conservative, which separates her from the rest of the family.  At 5'0" she was an all-state basketball player.  She's funny and smart and I talk to her more than her brother.

My old dog turned 15 this month.  She's deaf now and it breaks my heart.  Her eye's don't twinkle when I ask her if she wants to go for a walk.  She has a look on her face that says "why won't you talk to me".  I hope she dies in her sleep.  The thought of having to put her down is hard for me to take.

I'm usually having a Crown when I'm writing my "random thoughts' and Wednesday night when I wrote this in my notebook was no exception.  When you read this post I'll be sober.  Probably.

Can someone in the blogoshere tell me how to copyright a story?  I'm working on a novella and don't want someone to steal a life story and sell it to ABC's Afterschool Special.

Playing cards in Billings Friday with Skeets, Delm, and Jimmy.  It will be fucking awesome! We've known each other for 42 years.  Thank you 21st century technology for letting us talk to each other almost every day.

Life is like a bunch of chocolates except there's no Crown in them.  So that sucks.

I would like to sneak into President Barry's teleprompter and change a speech. Put in a line something like "Eye em we Todd did.  Eye em sofa king we Todd did.  My dixie wrecked."  Good times.

If you want to look at liberal hypocrisy you need to look no further than Sarah Palin.  Whether you agree with her or not, she is smart, funny and pretty hot.  If she were a dumbocrat we would be hearing about how smart she is, like they did with Hillary.  The democrats do not have an answer for her so they vilify her at every turn.  They should be afraid.  She is more popular than any democrat on planet earth including the waste of skin in the Whitehouse.

I need to watch more TV.  No not really. I will say that "Human Target" and "Justified" are awesome.

Playing golf Saturday at the Laurel Country Club with Cheese. Told me he's hitting a faded three-wood off the first tee and will birdie the first two holes.  I told him he's full of shit.  The guy can't hit the "high butter." Can't.  It's not in his game. He'll be double-crossed pull hooking it into the tall trees.  I'm predicting a Tigeresque club throwing tantrum by whole humber five. It'll be nice to leave with some of his money in my pocket.  Me, well lets just say that I have a feeling that Doctor Fairway will be making a few calls at the Laurel Country Club.  I can see it now, Cheese blowing it by me by 30 yards, telling me to get my hands higher then him hitting a 90 yard approach shot right in the forehead and  40 yards over the green. Its a summer tradition.

Been going to the gym.  Its a good thing they expanded. Wouldn't want them to not have enough weights for me to throw around.  Get your tickets early ladies. Just sayin.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Your Monday morning Calvin 4/19/10

January 27, 1986

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Movie clip Wednesday 4/14/10

So Boxer's theme this week is a "rainy day movie" and why you would watch it on a rainy day.  My choice is "Field of Dreams".  I watch it whenever it is on as long as I am alone.  It makes me cry. It's a movie about a man who has made a mistake and wants one more chance to say he's sorry. It's about a boy and his father.  I loved my dad. We had a great relationship. I was going to type "but" but I can't .  This movie is about a man wanting to have one last catch with his dad because he didn't realize what he had until his father had passed.  I'm fortunate that I did realize what we had but I still didn't "get" him until he was gone.

When I moved to Bozeman my father was living with me after he and my mom had split. He was elderly and I moved him in with me when I bought my first house. Leaving him was the hardest thing I ever did.  He never faulted me for a minute and actually said " I can't believe you stayed this long." He was happy that I was attending Montana State and he always liked it better than u.m. Baseball was his love and when we got cable in Malta it became mine as well.  We watched hundreds of games together. He was a Yankees fan his entire life. We didn't get the Yankees in Malta but did get the Cubs so they were in his heart as well.

I went home every fall to watch a world series game with him. In August of 1994, the owners locked out the players and there was no world series that October.  I didn't go home. I would see Dad at Thanksgiving.  He died November 11th.

My small library is filled with books of politics, history of America, and the history of baseball.  I've never forgiven baseball for robbing me of one last Saturday night with my father.  In those days I could tell you every good player on every team. Today I can't even name five players on the Cincinatti Reds and their logo is tatooed on my ankle.

"Field of Dreams" is about having that one moment you missed with someone special. It's about atonement for doing something wrong.  I should have went home and still played cards and talked baseball with my Dad.  There you have it. A rainy day with my favorite movie. Just being blue on a blue day.

I couldn't find the appropriate clip so I don't have one. It's a good theme nonetheless

My job is old enough to vote!


Today marks my 18th anniversary with my current employer.  That's a pretty good pull.  I was just going to work here for the summer back in April of 1992 when I finished student teaching at Three Forks.  Little did I know the turn of events that would lead a summer job to a successful sales career that not only pays me great but that I enjoy immensely.  The company was sold two years after I started working here and the new owner liked me (for whatever reason) and gave me a huge opportunity that I took full advantage of.  He gave me free reign of my department and pretty much has stayed out of the way.  I've made him a lot of money and he's been generous in return.  For once, I was in the right place at the right time. Debt free (well, except for my house), money in the bank, toys, guns, vacations in other countries.  Its been awesome.

How appropriate that on this, my 18th anniversary, I anxiously await to see if I am going to close the biggest deal of my sales career.  Although I only give it a 1 in 10 chance, it would be an awesome way to start my 19th year.  Regardless (or as my boss says, "irregardless")  I know one thing that is certain, there is a glass of celebratory Crown awaiting me at 5:30 tonight.   Not lying, I sure as hell deserve it.

I know this song has nothing to do with anything other than the title but what the hell. I like me some LRB!


Monday, April 12, 2010

The Battle from Gary's Canyon


I began the 2010 golf season this year much like I have the last 15 by making a trip to Sheridan, Wyoming to play a minimum of 36 holes on Masters Saturday and watching the final round Sunday with The Prodigy.  Our tradition is more expensive for me now as we have added a bottle of scotch to the mix on the first 18.  This is a portion of the bet that I have not been able to capitalize on.  No one to blame but myself.  This picture is me in "Gary's Canyon".  So named for my brother-in-law who evidently had a habit of hitting it here.  A lot!  This is after my tee shot on the 256 yard par three 15th hole. 

I would like to say that I was able to scramble for a bogey from here but alas, I scummed it around to a double.  TP made a par and as he was dormy from the tee box, had sealed up the scotch for a third straight year.  I didn't double or nothing it like a did last year and ended up buying a pretty expensive bottle of 16 year old Aberlour.  This year he'll be lucky if he gets a 4 year old bottle of Dewars. He played great, I played good, we had tons of fun like we always do.  The Masters in Sheridan, a tradition unlike any other.

(Five-Wood, don't even think about lipping off about my golf game.  Until you win our late summer "Battle for the Cap",  you just stay humble.)

Your Monday morning Calvin 4/12/10

January 8, 1986

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Kind of in neutral

I'm heading to Malta to see my dear old mother who just returned from wintering in Arizona.  From there, I will head to Williston, ND to see if there are any equipment needs in the oil fields there.  From there I head to Sheridan, WY to play golf with The Prodigy and watch The Masters.  Its our 15th straight year.  From there I will return to my little home here in the Gallatin Valley.  I don't have a laptop and will be on the go so I won't be blogging for a bit.  The rest of you will have to pick up my slack.  That shouldn't be hard to do.  Have a great Easter and I'll be back to posting in mid-April.