Why I root against the Red Sox

I'll try to put this subject into some perspective. I have five true best friends from my childhood. To this day, we all stay in constant contact. Its why the LBOH was started. One of the guys is Ralph. You've all heard me talk about him on many occasions. I can hardly write about him, or any of the others, without being flooded by the thousands of memories we've all shared. They are all great men who I consider myself fortunate to be associated with. Yes, I have an English minor and ended that sentence with a preposition. I had a couple of Crowns with Eric so I don't give a rats ass.

I met Ralph when I was four years old. That's 42 years ago for those of you keeping score at home. I didn't like him then and don't like him now. That might be a lie. I'd step in front of a bullet for him. But we have this thing. We don't root for each other's teams. There are two exceptions. We both root for Malta (of course). And he likes to see the Bobcats win and I root for alma mater, Eastern Montana College and Country Club. You don't really have to go to class there, just pay your tuition. Okay that might be three exceptions but my point is that we root for our HS alma mater and each other's college team so lets not nit pick. That's not my style. Well, its my M.O. but I digress.

Anyway, we when were little shavers, we picked our baseball teams. I had been a Cincinnati Reds fan since the first grade and he had been a Red Sox fan. Things changed in 1975 for us and how we rooted for each other. That year, the Reds played the Sox in what was one of the greatest World Series of all time. The Reds prevailed in seven games. My team had won and the rivalry was on. The next year the Reds one again athis time against the Yankees and the Sox had stunk yet again. Then in 1990 another title for the Reds. In 1986, the Sox lost a pivotal game six. The Buckner game.The Mets won game seven and the Sox were losers yet again.



I'll say the Sox could always be competitive but a World Series threat they never were. My life's dream was to have Ralph go to his grave not seeing the Sox win a title. Those dreams were dashed in 2004.



The Sox came back from a 0-3 deficit against the Yankees in the ALCS and swept the Cardinals to win the title. I was happy for Ralph, kind of. You really have to be around us to get the dynamic of how we root against each other.



Sidebar, in 2001, I was in Billings for Ralph's birthday. His wife was out of town so the day and night was ours. "We need to do something crazy while Anjie is out of town" he said. Before I could stop myself, I said " Let's get tattoos." "That's a GREAT idea." Ralph replied. So the next morning we had ink done. Ralph with a Red Sox logo on his left ankle and me with a Reds logo in the exact same spot.



After the Sox won in 2004, Red Sox fans crawled out of the woodwork. There were so many fucking "B" hats in Bozeman I thought I was living on Cape Cod. You see, I never hated the Sox, I just rooted against them to watch Ralph be miserable. There was joy in that. He feels the same joy watching the Reds wallow. But now, there are all of these pseudo Sox fans out there. They chant "Yankees suck" at my pub when they are playing the fucking Blue Jays. Sox fans today are losers. They have no appreciation for the history of the rivalry that, except for 2004, the Yankees have dominated. If they don't win in 2004, the Cat-griz is a bigger rivalry, but they did so now they think they are great.



To all the Sox fans not name Ralph (or you 5wood, Bob or Tooey) kiss my ass. You are bandwagon dickheads. You don't know the first thing about the intricacies of baseball. Do me a favor and go play kickball on I-90. Fags. Just saying.

It's still painful

Last week's 23-10 loss to the Lumberjokes of Northern Arizona is still bitter. The Cats moved the ball all over the place in the first half and then came out in the second half and sat on their hands. I would rather have watched my nieces play chutes and ladders than the football I witnessed last Saturday afternoon.

Most people are still claiming that the Cats have a tough defense. Really? Is that why they had another quarterback throw for almost 400 yards. Rushing four guys straight up and playing the ice cream soft defense in the middle while your corners start so far off the line they aren't even in the camera view half the time isn't what I call a stiff defense. The offensive play calling has become so predictable that I almost know what plays are coming.

Sorry folks but I am more than a little pissed off. This team hasn't come from behind at halftime under Ash in the last 1 1/2 season. Read that again. If the Cats are losing at halftime, they lose. Period. This trend needs to change. I'm also getting sick of the excuses I'm hearing. Look, I like Coach Ash and what he has done has been pretty good all things considered, but I want to see more and I want to see it now. 6-5 or 7-4 every year isn't going to keep you around long. Ash has maybe two more years after this one to show the fan base that he can coach in this conference.

This week the South Dakota Coyotes come to town. I expect nothing short of a 20 point victory. Anything else will be considered a loss by me. They will be lucky to be 6-5 if they don't elevate their game. Not a lot of optimism after this weekend for me.

Chiefs vs Redskins. Forecast for this game is horrible football.

I'm ecstatic that the Red Sox are out of the playoffs. It used to be fun to root against them. i would watch Ralph drink himself to Bolivian, softly smiling outside, high fiving myself inside. Then Boston won a title and every where you looked there were Red Sox fans, claiming to have been fans all the while. And they all hate the Yankees. Hate them. Yet none of these "lifelong fans" can even tell you the story of the history of why the Yankees are the greatest team in all of sports and the Red Sox aren't even in the top 10. Now, thanks to my LA Angels, I don't have to listen to these ignorant bastards. It used to be fun rooting against the Sox, now it's like a job.

The good news is that now that the Sox (and Twins) are out of the playoffs, baseball will be fun to watch and I can root against the Yankees. I can't do that when the Sox are in. Can't. Won't.

I hate the grizzlies and hope they lose. I will continue to DVR their games so that if they lose, I will have a fun game to watch.

Notre Dame has SC this weekend. I'm not feeling good for the Trojans this weekend. They don't have a real QB and have no real shot at the national championship. However, this will be the most speed ND has seen this year, especially on defense. Twill be interesting. Honestly, I think that SC wins by 20+. Pete Carroll could spend the week in a meth house in Compton and still have his team better prepared than Charlie Weiss. Just sayin.

My sister is coming home for a visit. She usually flies into Billings and I'm lucky if we get to spend two days together. This year she is flying to Bozeman. Going to be here today, going to Yellowstone tomorrow, then the Cat game. Wait. There's been a little change, now she isn't getting here til tomorrow afternoon. No trip to the park. A full day of not being together. I even had the day off tomorrow. Good thing I didn't rearrange my schedule for her or anything. Of course it's not my style to bitch about this kind of thing. I mean, I'm using a full vacation day, had big plans where we I was taking her to dinner, that kind of thing. She doesn't think taking a day off from work is a big deal. Wait again. That's why she's waiting til Friday. Because of a little flight change she is now leaving Friday so SHE wouldn't have to miss a day of work. Good thing this trip isn't all about me.

Rush Limbaugh is not going to buy the Rams. I hope they end up in Mexico City. Or Canada. That's what the NFL deserves. I say this as a Rams fan.


Short today.

Go Cats.

Really Oslo??

So, President Teleprompter is the Noble Peace Prize winner. Wow! North Korea and Iran are becoming nuclear powers. Afghanistan is a mess. The economy is still crap and we are going to have socialized medicine. My question is this: who was the president up against? Ryan Seacrest? Lady Gaga? Jon and Kate?



Honestly, how in the hell does this borderline imbecile win this award? Interesting way to start the day. It matches the three inches of snow and 18 degrees on the thermometer. I hate starting my Friday with "how long til Happy Hour?" but it looks like its going to be a long one.

Homecoming and some ramblings

I'm on the road most of this week. Going out in the great state of Montana to see if we can drum up some business so I have to post stuff now as I'll be too swamped Friday when I get back and I'm too cheap to own a laptop so I can't blog from the remoteness of my hotel rooms this week.

First, the Cats had a huge win against Weber this week in Ogden. Although the defense gave up almost 500 yards they came up big in the redzone only letting WSU score once in six trips. I still do not like our pass coverage. Way to soft everywhere, the middle, the edges, the seams. Name it. The Cats need to rush more than four or at least mix in some stunts. When they brought five or blitzed, the completion percentage was way down and turnovers were caused.

Its a big test this weekend against Northern Arizona. The Lumberwussies pissed one down their legs against the dark pink of missoula and squeaked one out against Northern Colorado last week. The Cats have always had a difficult time with NAU. They've also had a tough time following up a big win with a big win. This is a huge, and I mean HUGE game. A must win!! hahahahaha. Honestly though, the only way they make the playoffs is run the table. Big chance for this to be a statement game for the Cats. If they hand NAU their asses and send them home with a big beat down, there will be fear instilled in the rest of our opponents.

Before anyone starts getting big bulges in their pants for Bret Favre's performance last night on MNF, let me just say that there are at least 10 QB's in the NFL that could have done as well if not better than Asshat did last night. Honestly, it was as if Mike McCarthy and the Packers took a dive to apologize. I don't remember a game in my recent memory where the pass rush was as none existent as it was last night from the Packers. I was going to root for the Pack this year but after that pathetic showing, I'd rather watch my Rams complete their perfect 0-16 season.

On those same lines, Aaron Rodgers is a stud!!! Dude got sacked 8 times and still threw for almost 400 yards. McCarthy not kicking the field goal early was as stupid as the people who voted for Obama and it really changed the game late. Rodgers will be fun to watch but the Packers, who really haven't been significant for most of the last ten years, will always be 8-8 as long as McCarthy is running the show. Too bad for Rodgers. He'd look great in blue and gold.

Now that Chicago won't get the Olympics, I wonder if Obama will tend to more important matters, like the war and job creation. Maybe this is all a hoax. Maybe the puppeteers who got Obama elected are keeping him at all these ribbon cutting ceremonies so that the real man in charge can run the country. That man: Joe Biden. I can almost believe that.

When Michelle Tafoya, who knows nothing about football and isn't any fun to look at, kept after Favre last night about the "revenge" factor, I was just waiting for Favre to look at her and say "Hey Michelle, get in the kitchen and make me a pie!" Give him a break already.


Insert in Missoula. (This item temparily out of stock.)

The griz draw a tough one this week in the Cal Poly Mustangs. The Mustangs are ranked anywhere from 13th to 15th depending upon which poll you are reading. The minions of hell are coming off a bye week. I like CP's chances except that Missoula always cheats at home and the refs are bought and paid for so they will have to work extra hard to win this one.

Homecoming parade in Missoula

Yep. That looks like lots of fun. Remember, Cal Poly's school colors are green and gold so wear a little of that somewhere on Saturday with your blue and gold. Go CP Mustangs.

In case most of you don't know, I'm not a huge fan of Notre Dame. They got so lucky last week. Hey, when Ralph is telling me how lucky ND is then you know it's true. They get a week off before USC comes into Southbend.

So, I just returned from a bid opening at a neighboring county. During the course of the meeting the commissioners decided to create an HRDC position and begin advertising. This is a position that currently does not exist. Though my bid was lowest by $24,000.00 it was awarded to one of my competitors for various reasons that I obviously do not agree with. 24 large is a lot of cake and would go a long way toward paying for this new position. Though the rules were followed, the bid process was still circumvented. I never had a chance. The decision to purchase had been made and only the formality of the bid invitations remained. It is what is wrong with politics at every level. The citizens of Madison County got screwed today and they don't even know it.

Glasgow squeaked by Malta 13-7. That sucks. I hate Glasgow.

All right things to do and miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep.

Chicago is out.

Former IOC member Kai Holm said that the brevity of his appearance may have counted against him. The short stopover was "too business-like," Holm said. "It can be that some IOC members see it as a lack of respect." BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Its precisely moments like this that I should be allowed to drink on the job.

Random thoughts #13, short version

Things that crossed my mind while wondering, well, nothing really.

We are in a recession. The economy is still very shaky. Domestic terror plots are popping up all over and we are fighting wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. President Obama decides to go to Copenhagen to lobby for Chicago to get the Olympics? Are you kidding me? Great leadership. The next three and a half years are going to seem like an eternity.

So Montana's own stammering boob of a U.S. Senator Max Baucus has his own health care bill. "The time for reform is now." Really dipshit? The last 20 years of you asshats in DC not doing anything that hasn't been in your own self interest wasn't a good enough time for you? Thanks for the attention to detail Max. Here's hoping you get syphilis.

It's comments like the syphillis one that keep BG from sending my blog link to her parents. "You don't have to be mean." Yes, yes I do. I can be mean on this blog or go shoot a family of squirrels. Its a no brainer really.

El Paso by Marty Robbins is the greatest country song ever. About this subject there will be no debate.

IM-ing with Ralph and we both commented on how much joy we take in watching each other's teams do poorly. I don't care what you say, that's friendship.

Part of the Baucus plan was to fine you if you didn't have health insurance. Hmmmm. Let's see. If you couldn't afford health insurance, then we are going to fine you. Only in liberal economics does this make any sense. It does lend credibility to the fact that the vast majority of people not insured can afford it and are making other life choices and that this isn't at all about reforming health care but a power grab by King Obama and the rest of the liberal establishment.

I owe President Obama an apology. I was accusing him of serving Clinton's third term. It's obvious that this is Carter's second term only worse. My bad.

Quote of the week from who else but Tyler Durden regarding Roman Polanski"Many of the Hollywood elite defending Roman Polasnki say he shouldn’t go to jail just because he drugged a child then raped her while she begged him to stop, and that he’s already suffered enough by living his life in exile. It’s easier to understand that part if you pretend that he’s American. He’s French, so I’m not sure how a French guy living in France is considered “exile” but whatever. The point is he’s suffered. Or something.

But don’t think that Roman is unwilling to pay for his crimes. In fact he’s agreed to be placed under house arrest. Specifically, this house. This chalet outside Gstaad, Switzerland, where singing bluebirds presumably pull your sheets back in the morning and Mr Sun gives you a big thumbs up. Oh that poor man. He’ll never make it!"

I see that Brady Quinn is no longer the starter for your Cleveland Browns. Strange that. What with his hefty 62.9 quarterback rating and 1 touchdown pass this year. Is Eric Mangini mad? How can you bench someone from such a quarterback factory like Notre Dame? I mean it's produced Joe Montana and...well...goddammit if Joe "Big Sky" Montana isn't good enough for you than I don't know what to tell you. I mean Alabama has only produced Bart Starr, Joe Namath and Ken Stabler. Two of those guys are in the Hall of Fame and Stabler should be. You can have all the Heisman's in ND. Alabama produces NFL Hall of Famers and in the end, I really think that's what matters. Oh yeah, and real national championships. You know the ones where Alabama played another super tough team in a post season bowl and won. Not like those pseudo ND ones where they finished a season undeafted and then went and hid in a cave. Fags.

Ralph and I talk a lot on MSN instant messenger. He has it set up so that when I'm typing his display says "blah, blah, blah is typing". That's actually pretty funny. I'm more surprised that he had the skills to figure that out. Guy types like he has 5 thumbs and a hook.

Kind of a short random nothingness this week but you get what you pay for.

Cats vs Weber

Well, well, well the Cats go to Ogden tomorrow to take on Weber State in what is the first of seven "must win" games for the Bobcats. Don't you love the term "must win"? Like some games aren't must win. I know, if you've clinched your division blah, blah. Still, all games are must wins, especially if you root for MSU. Weber is tough. They are ranked 11th in the I-AA and have the best QB in the conference. I wish I felt good about this game but the truth is that I don't. Yes, the Cats looked better against UNC than they did against Dixie State, but I still wasn't blown away especially on the offensive side of the ball. I know that Coach Ash plays conservative and that he limits the plays he runs. That's all fine and dandy if you're the cream of the conference. My problem with that approach is that when it comes time to let it all hang out, your players don't know what to do. I love seeing the Bobcats blow teams out. It relaxes me. Beer tastes better as does whiskey and vodka, hell pick a drink, it tastes better when the Cats are up by 30. And I don't overly excited and spit my sunflower seeds into the hair of the lady sitting in front of me. I can't remember her name. Lovely woman and her husband is a rowdy rooter. It will be fun to see how big there three girls are this year.

The fact is this, if the Cats lose more than one conference game, they have no chance at the post season. They have the talent, they have the coaches. It just a matter of execution and desire. Tomorrow will really show me what this team is made of.

Meanwhile, in the land of the dark pink.........

The grizzlies have the weekend off before taking on Cal Poly next week for homecoming in Missoula. If you ever get a chance to go to homecoming in Missoula, pass on it. Its the largest mixture of hippies and potheads outside of a Phish concert that you can find in the western hemisphere. The grizzlies backed into a win at Fagstaff last week (oops, forgot the "l". No I didn't. Its what they deserve for handing one to the griz). As I stated two weeks ago "There is something about NAU and how they just make a mess in their pants when they play the griz. "

I really don't know how I can be right this much and not have my own sports talk show. Its amazing really. I truly am a diamond in the rough. And how much fun would it be to be able to make fun of grizzly fans and Irish fans every week? I don't thnk the amount of fun could be measured in human terms.

Speaking of the Irish, they truly backed into one as well. Are you fucking kidding me Purdue? Are you trying to make Jimmy Clausen look like the second coming of Joe Montana? I hope the Boilermakers lose every game this season after that pathetic defensive stand. Clausen could have thrown left handed on that drive and the Purdue defense couldn't have stopped him.

This week the Irish get my Washington Huskies. This is a much improved Husky team and will be the first really good defense the Irish have seen all year. Look for Clausen to get hit often and spend a lot of him on his back (as opposed to all fours like he's used to heyoooooooooo!!). Also look for Coach Lardbelly to finish of a 24 inch pizza by himself at halftime. Don't you Irish fans get excited if they win this one. UW is still a team on the rebound so this is a no win situation for the Irish. Unless they come away winning by 20, this is a defeat.

The 3M Company takes on Glasgow this week. I don't think there is any other town except for maybe Chinook that I love seeing Malta beat. I was going to say "I don't think there is a town I hate more except for maybe Chinook than Glasgow" but I changed it to be more positive. Its all part of the kinder, gentler me. That and the fact that my dad was born in Chinook so I really don't hate the town. Actually, I feel sorry for the kids from Chinook. Their mascot is the Sugarbeeters and their school colors are orange and black. It breaks your heart actually. Knowing those poor little buggers have to root for a member of the tuber family (beta vulgaris). Is this a mascot that sends fear into the heart of an opponent? I think not.

Look at its little arms churning the eggbeaters!! Its hilarious. I expect to see something like this on Yo Gabba Gabba. Anyway, I do hate Glasgow and hope the Mustangs party stomp the hell out of them. Malta's D has not given up a point the last two games but Glasgow has some talent (finally) and this should be a good game.

Alright, that's all for now. So here's how we are rooting 1) for the Cats over Weber, 2)the bye week over the u of m, 3) the Huskies over the nutless wonders from Southbend, and 4) the Mustangs over Glasgow.

Enjoy your weekend.

Go Cats!!