Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Pardon The Interpretation:

Dear Friends:

First of all, allow me to apologize for the lack of correspondence... Milk River Madmen was gracious enough to allow me to post on this great blog and I have failed to do so on a regular basis. A 2-Year old and creation of a Micro Brewery from scratch keeps a guy's feet in constant motion.

However, I was compelled to post this evening in light of two shitbag "sports reporters" who I happened to catch in all their glory on their HORSESHIT program "Pardon The Interruption".. Well you two slapdicks should apologize.

Their comments regarding the epic Wimbledon Match the last TWO DAYS, (2 DAYS!!! 118 games in the 5th Set! Suspended by Darkness TWICE!!!! Mind you, at the time of this post we still don't know the winner) are as follows

Tony Kornheiser: "Boring"
Mike Wilbon: "They should change the rules"

(The rest of this post isn't for Children...)

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!! I don't care if it's Tennis, HORSE, Jacks or fucking UNO, anytime two human beings are willing to wage war (metaphorically speaking) against one another for that long it's special. That it's happening at The All England Club makes it "newsworthy" maybe you two Oral Giants should look that word up! These two dipshits must think their makeup sessions prior to going on the air constitutes a stretch and warm up! What FAGS! If I had to bet they both folded up their pocket protectors and withdrew from a Spelling Bee when the quiet girl 4 years younger wearing the thick Glasses stepped to the Microphone!

Any true competitor recognizes that inability to concede and stops to witness it!

Wilbon pitched in High School which qualifies him to say nothing, and Kornheiser's claim to fame was going to school with the guy who wrote Air Supply's "All out of love"... I now know what that guy meant when he penned, "I'm lying alone with my head on the phone thinking of you and it hurts"

If I had to pick a guy to shoot fouls shots with no time left on the clock I'd take one of these Tennis guys everyday!! Well maybe not the Frenchmen, but that's another song.

So I hope you'll Pardon My Interruption, and don't let that show waste a minute of your precious time, I know it will never again waste any of mine!


Milk River Madman said...

Well at least now I can delete your voicemail. Great rant. I wish everyone could hear it. I might keep it until the LBOH.

Big Shamu said...

Yeah. Sorry but there's no way I want to watch 10 hours of tennis. Or Nascar. Or golf. Or just about any sport.
As for Tony, he's a writer. Not an athlete. He just happens to write about athletes and sports. He's a good writer, one I've read since way back in the days when the Redskins actually went to the Superbowl as participants. So yeah, I'd take PTI over ten hours of tennis any day.

The Prodigy said...

Update: Isner wins the Match 70-68in the 5th set and Mahut wins votes for Prime Minister of France from folks all over the world as the 1st Frenchmen to ever put up a fight! Tony is a writer, but to be credible he'll have to change his subject matter to needlepoint or liberalism like he close friend James Carville. And stay away from events that require physical exertion.

Furthermore it wasn't about watching the whole thing, but rather respecting the event and it's combatants. All that had to be said was what everyone else knew... Once in a lifetime and incredible competition. But that won't keep clowns like these guys on TV would it.

Big Shamu said...

Ah see there's the difference between us. Respect for smacking a little ball around for 10 hours. I don't have any. I reserve my respect for the people who deserve it like our troops, our police and firefighters, our teachers who try and teach our hard headed children, the scientists who extend our knowledge and understanding of our world, the doctors and nurses who hopefully ease our pains and the laymen and women who try and bring hope and love to the madness that our world so often seems on the brink of. With all these folks deserving and needing our respect, men hitting a ball on a court overseas for an extended length of time is way down on the totem pole of respect.

Milk River Madman said...


I think what TP is saying here is that these are "sports" analysts and they aren't showing respect for a great and epic sporting event. It's their livelihood to analize sporting events. TP is only respecting the event and its paricipants, which as a sports fan, is his perogative. He is certainly not putting them and their importance to planet earth in front of any of the groups you mentioned. Just giving his .02 on a couple of asshats. Why he watches them when he knows they will piss him off, well, that's a question for another day (insert smiley emoticon here).

The Prodigy said...

Big Shamu:

Wow, that's deep, glad I don't have to pack around that load everyday. I'll just saddle up here in rural america and watch you intellectuals save the world. You're doing fine work here the last 18 months. Hopefully we'll have something left when your done, but likely it will just be tennis in England that remains.